The rituals and traditions surrounding marriage in most cultures and countries are performed primarily to validate the importance of marriage for the continuation of a clan. Be it an Indian marriage, Christian wedding, Hindu marriage, Muslim marriage or wedding held in any religion or society, wedding rituals are largely done to assert a familial or communal sanction on the mutual choice agreed upon by the bride and groom to enter in a marital relationship. Wedding rituals occupies a significant part in most marriages held across the world and it is no different for Bangladeshi weddings. I realized the true worth of wedding rituals in Bangladeshi marriages when I recently attended the marriage ceremony of one of my close friends- Saheli Choudhary residing in the fascinating country of Bangladesh.
Saheli was tying the knot with a boy whom her parents found through one of the popular Bangladeshi matrimonial websites. Finding a match online for a Bangladeshi bride and groom was not easy until a few years back. However, with the launch of more and more Bangladeshi marriage websites, people are finding it easier to find their soul mates. Coming back to Saheli’s wedding, I was expecting to see glimpses of traditional wedding rituals and conservative ceremonies in her marriage as hers was an arranged marriage. But my idea changed very soon as I reached the wedding venue of my dear friend. True to the spirit of a traditional Bangladeshi wedding, there were several rituals and all of them were performed over several days.
Wedding rituals began with henna ceremony in which Saheli’s hands and feet were painted bright with beautiful Mehendi designs. Several ladies and little girls attending the ceremony were also getting their hands decorated with henna. Songs of Mehendi and peppy hit film numbers closely associated with weddings were also played in the background. Some guests and close family friends were also dancing to the beats of the wedding music.
After the Mehendi ceremony, came the occasion were the groom’s family came to bride’s home and put turmeric all over the face and body of the girl. The ceremony is called ‘Gaye Holud’. Saheli’s in-laws also put turmeric paste on her body and presented her with valuable gifts, including gold rings, silver anklet, necklace studded with precious gemstones and bangles. Sumptuous feast was arranged on all the days when prominent wedding rituals were performed.
On the wedding day, the priest was invited to perform certain important wedding rituals and solemnize the wedding. After the ceremonies were over, Saheli and her groom signed on the marriage papers and more celebrations followed thereafter. Guests reveled in the celebratory mood that could be visibly felt in the wedding venue. Music from the shehnai elevated the wedding atmosphere and the delicious feast was enjoyed by all. The pre- and post-wedding ceremonies that I saw made me realize that the Bangladeshi wedding rituals have evolved in tune with contemporary trends.
